Things I Have Said During Random Conversations

Is it that hard to be a decent human being?

Where can I get some water?

Why did you buy that?

Elbow pads and a helmet? Can’t we just go get a ball, go into the street and play right now?

I just want to write a letter. How can I just write a letter?

Do you have water?

Why isn’t your truckbed large enough to carry drywall?

If I don’t need bleach, why do I have to use bleach?

But my cellphone already has a clock on it.

Why would I want that in my life?

Horror movies make me not feel good so I don’t watch them.

But these pants are comfortable and stretchy. If my pants are comfortable, there’s a better chance that I will like you better because I’m happier. And then we can have better conversation.

Do you want my DVD player? I have one too many.

Even if I’m at the beach, if it’s too warm I’ll turn on the air conditioner.

I stop reading when I fall asleep and wake up for the third time. Then I put the book away, turn off the light and pass out.