The Great Compassion

(I just stumbled upon this entry, written on January 26, 2007 but not posted on the blog at that time. I still feel the same today.)

For the last month, I conducted a personal experiment.

I got the idea from walking around Borders bookstore on New Year’s Day, after having breakfast with a friend. Stores that were open had almost no customers, since most people were still sleeping or staying at home that morning. The silence gave me a chance to listen and think.

What I thought about was how quiet my mind was. My body was also at peace. I was happy and content. And I tried to figure out why, because if I could, I might be able to prolong that feeling.

I felt this way because the holidays were over and all the gift giving and obligations were finished. I didn’t party the night before, so my body wasn’t suffering because of it. I didn’t overeat during breakfast. I didn’t owe anybody anything. My house was clean. I wasn’t burdened with guilt or hate or any other negative emotion.

I had even worked a little the day before, finishing up some consulting work while waiting for the relatives to come over and watch TV on New Year’s Eve. When midnight struck, I toasted everyone with my glass of orange juice because I was still recovering from a bad cold and sore throat. The next morning, I had awakened with full strength and felt better than the night before. Even as the new year was just beginning, I already felt accomplished.

On New Year’s Day, I didn’t crave anything. I didn’t need to possess anything to make myself feel better about myself. I didn’t hate anybody. I didn’t need to be somewhere special, or do something special, or buy something, or look at something, or think about something specific. I didn’t burden myself with anything.

Burden. That was the word I was looking for. From that moment in the bookstore until today, I decided to try these things:

I stayed away from anything negative. This includes people, places, and things, like TV shows, movies, books, magazines, and web sites that disparage something or someone else. Trying to stay away from it doesn’t mean I always succeed, since there’s already so much negativity in everyday life. I figured if I tried, there’s a good chance that at least half the time I will be engaged in positive behavior, and that’s a good balance.

I stopped complaining. Whenever the day became challenging, I simply worked harder. Whenever someone struck up a conversation that belittled someone else, I did my best to change the subject, or just let them know that I’m listening but that I would not contribute to their belittling remarks, and waited until we were able to move on to another subject.

I focused on getting things done instead of thinking about getting things done. I stopped being envious. I didn’t look back in regret because that would have been more wasted time that could be used to get more things done. I didn’t wait for anybody else to get going and then follow them. If anything, they would follow me, not because I am ahead of them, but because I was walking a good path.

I only did things that made me genuinely happy. I didn’t do anything to prove something to somebody, or to please somebody, or to be accepted into a group, or to keep people from talking about me. If something didn’t feel right or was causing me more pain than what it was worth, I stopped doing it or walked away from it.

So what has happened since I started doing this? I am able to keep a steady, quiet mind. I am more content and happy. I’m getting more done. I am more successful unto myself.

The Dalai Lama wrote that The Great Compassion is attained when a person is in a healthy state of existence. From that healthy existence, that person will be an example of positive energy, encouraging others to be healthy as well.